Column: Ring My Bell - The Scientific Synopsis of the Real World Phenomenon knows as the Booty Call

I ran across an article today, during my hourly news updates at work, which caught me by surprise and titillated my interest. And memory. An article that I can proudly say was on a reputable news site, msnbc.com, but that could have easily been posted on theonion.com as a faux find or even mixed in with tmz's sultry nonsense. Yet, it is based on actual scientific research, from experts in the subject: college students, who else?! The nature vs. nurture ideas about the infamous 'booty call' were up for debate at the University of West Florida, in which psychologist Peter Jonason (clever name in such a study) led a team in researching the late-night invites. Were they strictly sexual in nature, or was there some sort of intimacy inherently involved? And where on the spectrum of human relationships do booty calls lie, with monogamy at one end absolute sexual prowling on the other. I would agree with most of the initial findings of this less-than-diligent online surveys of merely 289 relationship-pendulum students: requests are made by calling or text, it is a convenient hybrid of long-term and one-night stand relationships yet is purely on the side seeking sexual pleasure. As well, it is brief, to the point and steers away from lingering emotion. Sounds about right - but any Hollywood movie could have told you that. In fact, Netflix Booty Call and report back your findings asap. And in particular, one wouldn't need to limit their consulting to college students: booty calls and random acts of sexual satisfaction maintain a scared place within most sexually active people, either currently or from their past. Take a moment and recall Psychology 101: Freud details the animalistic tendencies innate to human existence and relationships. However, I would be interested to know, instead, how the nature of booty calls has changed over time; hopefully evolving, but nonetheless steadfast in getting the craving quenched. Have men and women grown seedier and more desperate? Or have we past a long ago era where men would at least pretend to get to know you, out of respect and decency, before the forthcoming wham-bam? I would venture to say that the only thing that surprised me about the supposed research into this complex, yet sex-savvy field, would be it's position in relation to the other extremes: monogamy and one-night stands. According to Jonason, while all aspects incorporate sex, one-night stands typically have the least amount of sex acts as opposed to booty calls - the idea being that booty calls have consistency and trial-&-error on their side, much like a relationship. On the other hand, one-night stands tend to be more emotional; holding hands, kissing and cuddling, probably because the expectation of impending intimacy allows for a heightened acceptance of outward affection. Lets face it - your only going to be together for a few hours anyway, so the speed of getting to know each other and feeling comfortable makes sense. Then again, repeatedly seeing someone for the utmost of intimate acts, sex, should always abide by that same logic, right? Perhaps, but in reality and science, the fact is that what breaks up most consensual booty calls is the expectation for more; more emotion, time, and heart. In the meantime and between time, before tonight's possible tripe onto the nearest bed, couch or kitchen floor, scientists have decided to invest more "longitudinal work" for the horizontal mambo, and I personally, couldn't be more thrilled with the idea. The only question remains: do they need any extra research done?